Holiday Weekend!

This was the second year that Leila was really excited about fireworks. Here she is with little Sidney Pfeiffer watching some at home fireworks. She even managed to stay up late enough to see the Coralville fireworks. I love fireworks, but they are even better now that Leila and I can sit together and ooh and aah over our favorites!


Resting up after a walk through the fossil gorge at Coralville Lake

Cassie helped Leila cool off :)


Such an easy going baby. It was 85 degrees and the sun was hot. We stuck on the sunhat and glasses, rubbed on some sun block and she fell asleep in the baby carrier! Look at that smile!

An attempt at the water fountain...too cute not to capture.

I think these boys need a sister! :) Bryce and Eli really like Thea!

Jeans

make a baby look so grown up!

The little things...

One of the best things about being a mom to two...watching Thea's face light up and her little legs kicking when she sees big sister come near. I only hope she learns from Leila how to be a smart, sweet, brave little girl who will play with any kid who will have her and doesn't manage to pick up the stubbornness and tantrum throwing skills. I guess I should hope she doesn't pick those things up from me either, huh?

How you doin'?

She looks awfully cute in her bumbo seat...too bad her legs are too fat to sit in it for long. Her feet turn purple after a couple of minutes!


I bought a little floor gym at a garage sale, so far it is 3 dollars well spent. Leila likes to cheer Thea on as she attempts to lift her head during tummy time, and keep her company while she plays on her back too.



Makes a good sleeping mat too!

Got Milk?

I certainly do!! I have been blessed with an abundant supply of milk for my baby. Breastfeeding is something that I feel really good about doing for my children, and I know that I am giving my babies the best possible start in this world. Breast milk has shown to protect babies from all kinds of illnesses. In fact, when a mother is sick, she passes on the antibodies for her illness directly to her nursing infant to help and protect them from contracting the illness themselves.
Recent studies have shown that breastfed babies are even believed to have extra protection against childhood cancers. Another cool thing I recently learned about the boob juice...it has Stem cells in it! What an amazing substance.

Not to mention the benefits for me...reduced risk of both breast cancer and heart disease!

So, there actually is a point to this post. Because I am both blessed to have an abundant supply, and such a strong believer in the benefits of breastfeeding, I have decided to become a donor for the Mother's milk bank of Iowa. The milk bank provides milk to premature babies, who are often too underdeveloped to be able to process infant formula. It also provides milk to infants with other special needs, and contributes milk to be tested for the kinds of studies that result in more evidence for the merits of breastfeeding.
I added a ticker to the sidebar of my blog to track the number of ounces I am able to donate, on top of exclusively breastfeeding Thea. Wish me luck! And for those of you that are skeeved out by the idea of sharing breast milk, I have been through blood tests to ensure my health and my milk is very carefully handled, pasteurized and tested for bacteria before it is given to any other baby.

Here is some more information about the Mother's Milk bank of Iowa: http://www.uihealthcare.com/depts/uichildrenshospital/milkbank/index.html

My babes!

Our littlest hawkeye trying out the bumbo seat. Her legs are a bit on the chunky side and the bumbo was kind of a tight fit! :) And yes, her toe nails are painted.


Leila and her Pop pop. She loves him bunches, and every time she wants something that I am not giving to her she tells me, "I'm gonna have my pop pop buy it for me!"

3 Months

Already!

Work

The week before Thea was born I was planning to keep working even though I was past my due date. As it turned out I just couldn't handle it mentally anymore, or I may have lost it on some well meaning lady who couldn't help herself but to ask me, "When are you going to have that baby?!"

I wrote my boss an email to explain to her that I thought I needed to give up until after my maternity leave. I felt really bad about it and offered to do work from home if she wanted me to, and she responded to tell me that first of all she understood and second of all, the only one pressuring me to work was me and not to worry about it.

Now that I am back at work, and trying to make the part time schedule successful, I am constantly reminding myself that I am the only one putting on the pressure. It's true, but I have to remind myself of it. I am a people pleaser and I am not good at putting myself and my needs and my want to be home with my kids first. The truth is, I would feel a lot more comfortable and a lot less guilty if I was working full time, but I am a lot happier working part time. I am just not comfortable with being a special circumstance. Maybe less guilty isn't true...I do remember the guilt of full time daycare too, and it also isn't comfortable.

Now that I have Thea and she is such a good baby, about 70% of me wants to have a 3rd baby. Not now, but after Leila goes to kindergarten. The biggest reason I have for not having more kids...because I want to be able to give work all that is expected of me. If you can't tell, Mommy-Tricia and Work-Tricia are definitely at odds. As it stands right now, I feel like I am balancing those things, but Work-Tricia is tapping her foot and asking, "When are we going to get back on track?" Mommy-Tricia is thinking lets keep this up for the next decade or so and keep on spitting out those beautiful babies!

I think it might already be time to review my post from a couple of months back to remind me of how hard it is when babies don't sleep.

One thing I have learned...the best of both worlds doesn't really exist. Even with an understanding employer and a wonderful care provider for my children, the tug of war continues to rage.

Fun Days

Last night our friends Matt and Cindy brought their boys Bryce (3) and Elijah (1 1/2) up so we could take all of the kids to fun days. Fun Days is your typical community festival that they have here in North Liberty and last night was family appreciation night. It was so sweet to see how excited Bryce and Leila were to go to the carnival!
I so wish I had my camera with me :( Cory took a couple of pictures on his phone, if they turn out I will add them here so you can see how stinkin' cute you little babies were sitting in the mini Ferris wheel. As soon as they got in Bryce started getting scared and Leila was surprisingly happy. (She is a big wiener when it comes to "danger".) Once around and they were both yelling at the carnie that was manning the ride to let them off! :)
Leila loved the bounce house and was having a really good time checking out the rides. Then we came to the giant slide. It was one of those that you slide down a mat on to make you go faster. Leila really wanted to go on it. Now, knowing our Leila, and the fact that she won't go down even the larger slides at our little playground, I had my doubts.
She picked up her burlap mat and swung it over her shoulder as she took off up the steps with confidence. I watched my little girl from the ground where she looked so tiny, like a little baby trying to play with the big kids, while at the same time she looked so grown up, independent and brave. She didn't even ask her daddy to go with her on the slide, she was going to conquer this thing on her own! As I watched her climb the stairs I had a feeling of pride at her bravery and a giant smile on my face. Did I know this girl? I couldn't help but wonder what was changing in my little one to make her turn into such a big kid so quickly, when it seems like just weeks ago she was clinging to my side and begging me to rescue her from the tiniest bits of adventure at the local park.
Leila reached the top of the slide and she took her mat down off of her shoulder, set it down at the top of the slide and turned around and started back down the stairs. I couldn't help but laugh. Now that is my girl! :)
Cory ran up after her and helped her back up to retrieve the mat and then walked his baby girl all the way down the steps back to the safe and familiar ground. Maybe she isn't totally grown up after all. I don't mind.
After the slide experience we tried a couple more rides. One was a big maze that the kids could run through that included climbing a rope wall, and crossing a swinging bridge. After she started through the maze I noticed the swinging bridge. Leila does not do swinging bridges. Matt and Elijah went and saved our little princess and carried her down. We capped off the night with a ride on the little planes that go around in circles. Leila and Elijah enjoyed the ride, and as they flew around the circle I could hear Leila singing the theme song to her favorite cartoon...Little Einsteins. If you don't know the show, it is 4 little kids that go on adventures in a rocket, that looked a bit like the little pink plane that our kids were riding on.
What a great night!

This picture is hilarious...Leila's first attempt at photography!


Leila holding her baby sister, also hilarious because Thea looks HUGE


Look at how adorable I am!?!?!


Leila wanted Thea to play playdoh with her...this was my solution. Cute baby feet x2!


If there were audio on this photo you would hear two kids banging away on the piano and Leila singing at the top of her lungs, "I want to be, part of that world!" (lately she rotates between 101 Dalmations and The Little Mermaid--She likes to kick it old school)


And once again, Look at how adorable I am!?!?!

Musings from the Mother's Room

Today ended my first week back at work. Overall I would say it has been a success. I already have some work assignments that I am pretty excited about and Thea has been doing well with daycare. Both days she refused her first bottle, but stubbornness gave way to hunger and she took her other bottles with no problems. It just isn't the same as getting it straight from the tap!

My workplace is a pretty mother friendly environment, not only am I able to work this part time schedule while my baby is young, but they also provide a private room to be used for pumping. The mother's room is off of one of the women's restrooms in my building. The room has a comfy chair, a little table, a small refrigerator and a massage table. Don't ask my why there is a massage table, I really don't get that.

Twice a day I grab my portable pump, Bessie(I am thinking we spend enough time together that she deserves a name), and head on up to the dairy barn.

I have been listening to The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People while I pump. It is kind of strange to lactate to Steven Covey, but I am getting used to it. I was thinking about this the other day and wondering if I was programing myself to have milk let down when I hear discussion of emotional bank accounts and paradigm shift. I hope not. Funny how The 7 Habits continues to remind me the strategies I just learned about dealing with children in 1-2-3 Magic.

Today when I arrived in the room there were two trashy tabloid magazines. It was almost serendipitous, given that I had forgotten to bring my iPod. A sure sign that God wanted me to read up on the latest with Jon and Kate + 8, so I did just that.

I am curious about the other women that use the Mother's room. When I was pumping for Leila for 10 straight months I had an idea of who the other mom's were. Sometimes I would have to wait outside the room for my turn. One unfortunate time I walked in on a woman during her pump session. Awkward!

Back then, aside from the faces of women who worked on other contracts and I had no interaction with, I knew them only by their pumps. Along with me and my Medela there was also an Ameda Purely Yours and another Medela, a few years old so I assumed that mom was not on her first babe.

2 years later I am back in the pumping room and I have yet to see another pump, but I was greeted during my first trip to the Mother's room by two photographs stuck to the fridge. Two pictures of baby boys. I brought a picture in to work with me today of my baby girl to post next to the little boys but I forgot on both trips to bring it to the room.

I remember back in 2006 when I sat in the mother's room on my first day back from work crying while I pumped because I missed my baby girl so badly, looking down at the older Medela pump lined up along the wall and wondering how that Mom was able to put herself through this twice. I wonder if some new mom will see my pump sitting on the massage table and have the same thought about me. Maybe I should leave a note on Bessie "It gets easier, and it is so worth it."

The forgotten family member...

has been getting some more attention these days. Leila really likes to give Zoey treats and Sawyer has finally decided to get over his fear and give Zoey a chance.

Thea and Quincy. Quincy is Cory's nephew Kyle's baby boy. He is about 3 weeks old and I am sure that being next to our chunker makes him look even smaller! ;)

Matching princesses!

Fun at the park, who says you can't climb in a dress? I am raising a very lady like little kid, huh?!

baby updates!

I probably shouldn't take a lot of time at this since as I speak Grandma is upstairs rangling with all three of her grand babies while I sit in Andrea's quiet basement uploading pictures and updating my blog. I won't feel too bad about it though since Grandma was just begging for updates. This is what she gets!

So, I am nearing the end of my maternity leave, which is a little bitter sweet, but I have to say it is mostly sweet. I have really enjoying having this time with Thea, but I am really ready to get back in the swing of our "real life." Since I am going to be working part time, I don't feel nearly the heartache over leaving the girls at daycare that I did when Leila was the infant. I don't like sending a baby to daycare, but she will only be there 2 days a week and I will get to return to my work, that I honestly enjoy. I am a little worried about the guilt I will feel at not being able to turn out the amount of work as a full time employee, but I am really going to try to not let that bother me. Along with being part time, I am also going to be taking breaks throughout the day to pump breastmilk for Thea. I have come up with a plan to make this productive time though! :) Our public libraries have books on CD so I am going to put some books on my iPod to listen too while I pump. I am going to start with The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. I figure, for having taking tons of business classes and working in a professional career, it is probably pretty shameful that I have never read this book, and so I am going to kill two birds with one stone. Now enough about me...

Leila has been having a pretty good couple of weeks. The warm weather has done us both a lot of good. We have been taking walks, going the park and she is trying to master ride the tricycle. Just yesterday I took her out to ride her trike. She is used to being pushed, but we took the push handle off of it and told her it was time she peddled herself. Well, she made it about 4 houses down before she got off and refused to peddle. She is stubborn, but so am I. I think the neighbors enjoyed the show as we stood on the sidewalk and argued. Leila finally pushed her trike on to its side and threw a big fit, so I pushed her right back home! :) Better luck next time!
We have recently starting going to gymnastics class at the rec center. The first time Leila would not participate at all and it was a really miserable experience. This last week was a vast improvement though and I think she had a lot more fun. Hopefully the new class schedule for summer will work well for us so she can keep going. I am hoping it will help her get over some of her fears and work on following directions.
She is a beautiful spirited little girl and she really loves her sister. Though lately she has been begging for a baby brother. She even asked me if we could trade Thea for her new little cousin Quincy. Quincy is cute but I am very much attached to my little squishy, so I don't see that happening! :)

Thea is wonderful, beautiful and getting to be a lot of fun. She loves to smile and is on the verge of a giggle, I can almost get it out of her! She has been sleeping through the night! AMAZING! I don't mind saying it outloud, though I know it is a jinx, because I am sure it won't last forever, but for now we are really enjoying the rest!

As for Cory, I can tell you that he has been busy with work, and every day he comes home to a house full of girls that love him to no end. Leila is even more of a Daddy's girl now then she was before Thea came around. Everytime he leaves she asks me when he will be back.
At daycare last week Leila told one of the teachers, "My Daddy loves me and he is going to pick me up after work!"
Thea saves some of her biggest smiles for Daddy too, so I may have two Daddy's girls on my hands.
Maybe when Leila gets her little brother he will be a Momma's boy! HAHA Just kidding!

Zoo!

We made a trip to Tabor last weekend for my cousin Allison's high school graduation. We had a great time hanging out with family and managed to fit in a trip to the Henry Doorly Zoo!
We met up with the Collins Family (high school friends of Cory's)and had a great day exploring the zoo. Considering that we usually make our annual zoo trip in the dead of summer when it is 100 degrees and miserable, this was a great experience! Even Thea was a trooper and had a good day.

Leila and her little stuffed deer are REALLY excited about the aquarium!

Checking out the turtles

My beautiful sisters with our mom!

Thea hanging with Grandma Lori on her first trip to the zoo.

Leila is getting to be a very big Gorilla.

Daisies

It is official. Grandma Dalene's daisies (referenced in this post http://mommytolbc.blogspot.com/2007/09/daisies.html) are blooming in North Liberty!

I am not in a great place, and probably should choose another time to blog but I have a lot on my mind so prepare for the mental diarrhea. I came to a realization about myself today as I was downing a Diet Dr. Pepper. I have no self control. Every day I think to myself, "Today I am going to watch what I eat and not drink so much pop." And every day I load up on junk (ice cream and granola bars today) and drink way too much pop (I drank 4 1/2 liter bottles of pop today, yes that is 2 liters.) Wow. So not only am I fat and getting fatter, but I am poor. I spend about 40 dollars a month on pop. That seems outrageous to me, and yet, I still keep buying the stuff. The worst part is, Leila likes it too. Every time she sees me with one she asks for a drink. Now, I know this isn't PC but I don't mind her having some pop from time to time, but I am not a fan of the caffeine and aspartame that she is taking in when swigs down as much Diet Dr. Pepper as she can manage before I tell her she has had enough. I am ok with pickling myself in chemical ridden soda but I owe it to her to consider her health more carefully. Damn it this lead by example stuff is hard to handle. So there you go. Junk food and diet pop. Every night I go to bed feeling like a failure because I can't even handle feeding myself without going overboard.
So not only do I lack the will power to kick the carbonation addiction, I behave the SAME WAY when it comes to money. Money is really tight right now, and it is going to be for a couple of years. I have been trying to do smart meal planning and grocery shopping and not buying things that we don't absolutely need, but just like that chocolate ice cream, I walk out of Target with a cart full of stuff that I had to have and 100 dollars less than I brought with me. If you saw what my paychecks look like, you would know how important that 100 dollars is. So I go to bed at night disappointed in myself and regretful about my consumption.
I am enrolling Leila in a gymnastics class. 40 dollars a month that we don't really have. What are the odds that I can kick the pop habit and replace my 40 dollars worth of sweet bubbly pop in exchange for a fun activity for Leila? Wish me luck.
My over consumption and general gluttony has really got me down. After Leila was born I wrote a blog post that I have linked in my sidebar, about self acceptance. Three years later, I am still doing a terrible job of living a life that I can be happy with. I want to go to bed feeling content, accomplished, healthy and relaxed. I need to get past my own insecurities, tackle my bad habits and learn to "Let Go and Let God." What an exhausting to do list. If only I could accept and appreciate myself enough to put in the work.

2 months!

She doesn't look happy, but she sure is getting big!


Leila wanted in on the action too :)


And just because she is so cute!

Leila LOVES her new sand and water table!

Even though she kicks him and steals his toys...Sawyer loves Leila

I can't wait to play in the sunshine!

I Love my toys!

Look at my cheeks. I am cute, I know it.

Terrible 2s? Yeah right.

The days keep flying by. I have just over 3 weeks of maternity leave left and it seems like just yesterday that Thea was born.
The weeks have been flying by us and Thea keeps growing! She is already in size 2 diapers and most of her clothing is now size 3-6 months. I have been going through her clothes trying to make sure she has an opportunity to wear every one of her cute new outfits before she outgrows them. It is so sad to pack up all of those cute clothes knowing she has only worn them ONCE! I am a bit of a Gymboree addict so I try to make sure that none of those clothes go unworn! :)

Leila has been a challenge. This week especially has been a challenge. I try really hard to make sure that Leila's days at home aren't boring and that she gets attention and we do activities that are fun for her, but it gets really difficult to keep her happy. I am sure part of it is just that she is 3 and has a new baby sister taking part of the attention. Along with that, she refuses to nap. If I want to force her, it takes an hour or two of fighting and then the hour or 2 that she actually sleeps and our whole afternoon is shot. I let her go without napping, she is a TERROR once 4:00 hits. It is really a no win situation. I really want us to enjoy our time together, but I find that I spend most of our days redirecting her, or threatening her with time or, or giving her time outs. It has been a major rain on my parade. I had very high hopes for this time and I have been looking forward to this since Cory and I decided to pursuit my staying home part time.

On the work front, it is official, when I go back to work on June 1st, I will be a part time employee. I will be working Monday, Tuesday and Thursday and spending Wednesdays and Fridays at home with the girls. My new schedule, and the fact that I really enjoy my job and the people I work with has me really looking forward to going back. I appreciate the time I am able to spend at home, but I would really really like to get back in the swing of things. I decided to take this much time because I believe that babies need their momma's and I wanted to give Thea a full time at home mom for as long as we could, but I am really feeling restless and like I am not at my best. I would not make a good stay at home mom. On top of that, our home does not have the space to play. I really wish we had a playroom where Leila could truly do as she pleased, as it is, her things are spread out through the house in rooms that also contain things that are NOT her toys, and of course those are the items that she really wants to play with. The terrible twos are nothing compared to the threes. I love my daughter so much and it kills me to spend so much time upset with her. Something has to give. I am now on the prowl for books on discipline...I need some fresh ideas to save my sanity.