Leila has been really into spelling lately, and she loves to type on the computer. Of course there are a lot of tricks to spelling correctly in the English language, and Cory and I are never sure if we should correct her when she spells things wrong, but phonetically. We decided that for now, phonetically will do because we don't want to discourage her. The other night she spelled, "CATRPILR" and this one she was especially proud of, so we took a picture, "DADE"
Love-A-Lot (The girl's daycare) has a Thanksgiving tradition of hosting a turkey lunch for all of the kids and the parents of the bigger kids. This is the 2nd year that Leila's group was included and so Cory and I took a long lunch on Tuesday to go have lunch with Leila. The kids sang a couple of songs that Leila refused to participate in, and then the teacher read off each child's Thanksgiving letter. They got to choose who to write to, and what to say. They also had each child make themselves a placemat with a collage of their favorite foods.
Here is Leila's letter to Mommy:
Of course this is the time of year that we all are conditioned to reflect on what we are most thankful for. I like to think that I am the kind of person who completes this reflection exercise more regularly than during that annual turkeyfest, but there is something about the spirit of Thanksgiving that requires deeper thought and feeling.
This Thanksgiving I am thankful for the continued health of my family, my 2009 blessing who is now 8 months old and into everything, my three year old sassy/stubborn/brilliant blessing est. 2006. I am thankful for my loving husband, who does so much to keep me sane and all of us happy and well taken care of. I am thankful for my in-laws, who created and nurtured him into the wonderful man that he is. I am thankful for my parents for so many many reasons, but number 1 would have to be the amazingly loving family that they raised me in. They set the bar high and I strive to love my children as they always have loved us, and instill the same kind of loving friendship among my children that I have with my siblings.
My friend Vaike who passed away just a couple of months ago once posted on our message board about a radio show that she listened to. There was a story on there about a man who had created such love around him, that his children just wanted to be with him. As Vaike said, he had created a legacy of love. She had hoped to be able to leave that legacy for her family, and I think she did. I can tell you that my Grandmother left that legacy, and my parents are living that dream right now.
I am so thankful for each of my sisters, and my brother. I couldn't imagine better friends. I am thankful for Andrea and the family that she has built. Steve and Sawyer and soon to be baby sibling Smith are a continuation of my own family, and I am so glad that my girls will have the Smith children to grow up with, so even though I can't manage to have the large family that my parents did, my kids won't lose out on growing up around lots of other kiddos!
I am so Thankful for my family beyond the immediate people that I get to spend my day to day with. I have so many Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles and Cousins that are not only family, but people that I consider friends. The love in my life is overflowing my heart and I feel so immensely blessed beyond any reward I could have possibly earned.
I am Thankful for the internet, to keep me in contact with those that I don't get to be close to in miles. I am thankful for the opportunity that I have to look at new homes for my family that will more than suffice in space and aesthetics. I am thankful for DVRed cartoons, which helps me through the days after the nights without rest, and Diet Dr. Pepper. Oh what would I do without you?
I hope that you all have just as many or more blessings to count this holiday season. Now on to Christmas. I am not interested in getting out the decorations this year as we are trying to declutter and get our house ready to sell, but with a 3 year old in the house, I feel it is my duty. We won't be doing it this weekend though, maybe next week? Ugh.
What is your favorite food?
Peanut Butter and Jelly!
What is your favorite thing to do with mommy?
Play with Thea
What is your favorite thing to do with daddy?
when he tickles me
What is the most fun thing you have ever done?
Go on PopPop's boat. If I go on the front of the boat, I am very brave!
What is your favorite day of the week?
Mommy days (Wednesday and Friday), because I get to play
What do you like about Thea?
I like to say boo to her, she laughs
Do you like being a big sister?
Yes, because I like to chew on toys
What is your favorite animal?
Elephants because they have a long trunk and floppy ears.
Who is your best friend?
You are
What do you want for Christmas?
A balloon.
Do you have anything else you want to share?
I don't know how to ride a bike.
I love to go to a hotel and see the pool.
I love to go on the boat and I love to stay with my daddy
I want to play a game on your computer.
Yes, very late...Thea turned 8 months old on Friday the 13th! Look at my big girl! I had to give up on the paper signs this month. She was not allowing it to sit by her, she wanted to eat it.
Yesterday I decided to spend my lunch time at Old Navy in search for red Christmas tights for Leila. As I was walking around the store BY MYSELF I was reminded of what it is like to be out of the house, not at work and also without someone attached to you. As I roamed the store looking at all of the adorable winter clothes for girls I thought about my own girls and how fast they were growing out of their own clothes. Leila is very close to being too big to shop for in the baby girls section of the store, and to me, that feels very premature.
My kids are so cute, and interesting and funny. I should know this, I spend a lot of time with them, as it should be. But if I am completely honest about it, maybe just a little bit too much. It is the classic mommy guilt conundrum. I love my kids, I feel like I should be the one that is with them whenever possible...but that 30 minutes alone in Old Navy felt a little bit too foreign to me, if you know what I mean. I am uncomfortable even typing this, because it doesn't seem right to me, but in the last 8 months I have attended a football game with my husband and friends and spent about 2 hours at a party with work friends, without Cory. I am not complaining, but I guess I kind of am...can you feel my guilt seeping through the screen? :)
I miss my husband, I miss myself. I miss a full nights sleep, and eating without having to hold anyone down or beg anyone to try their dinner.
It is not for a lack of baby sitters or opportunity that I find myself in this predicament. I have had offers, and I almost always turn them down. I think it is my competitive nature that keeps me running this marathon without a break...I know other mom and dads have date nights, time for each other and time for themselves, but I get some kind of sick satisfaction in going on doing everything without a break. Kind of like the baby nursing...I don't enjoy nursing, I would adore the ability to go out and not worry about pumping, but this is what is best for my kid, and I will stick it out if it means I pump at home between feedings to make sure there is enough milk to get us through the week.
Why do I do this? I claim competitive nature, but part of me thinks that now I have an excuse for being short with my 3 year old, or letting her watch too many cartoons. Not reading and interacting with my 8 month old as much as I probably should. If I took better care of myself, I might have to admit that I am just naturally not a good mother, and that thought scares me. Even if I did get away, I would spend the whole time missing them. One of the torturous realities of motherhood.
I wish I could be one of those fun witty bloggers with a huge following who can stay at home and collect advertiser money to pay for my life, but then I read over the gloomy crap I write and I realize, I had better keep my day job.
Much to my dad's chagrin, mom brought home a new baby kitten from Grandpa Warren's farm. When she called from the road to tell us to put Zoey outside, I knew right away why. Zoey would eat a kitten if given the opportunity. Little Bella is quite cute, and this coming from a not cat person. Leila loves her.
Last weekend we all traveled to Lincoln, NE for my cousin Brandon's wedding reception. The kids were very excited to have a party to go to, and they had a great time. Leila was totally enthralled by Polly in her wedding dress. She has this wonderful enchanted look in her eyes when you talk about weddings. She loves to get to go to princess parties, and nothing says princess like a wedding dress! I recently pulled my dress out of the closet and tried it on for her, she was very excited! Thea got to meet her Grandma Lorna for the first time!
I was recently reminded of a time a couple of years ago when I went to visit with my pastor. I was having what I might consider to be a crisis of faith.
The following Sunday I went to church by myself. Which I normally do not like to do, but I really wanted to and needed to hear God's word that day. My pastor, who nearly always seems to be speaking right to me literally did that Sunday when he sang this song during worship. I wish I could find a recording of it to share here, because it was so powerful to hear.
I asked the moms on my message board for some book recommendations a while back. I requested something that was spiritually uplifting and so when the book Three Cups Of Tea was recommended, I assumed it didn't fit my criteria. I put it off to read the Fearless book that I posted about a couple of weeks ago and just finished Three Cups of Tea last week, and it has been occupying my mind ever since.
One of my favorite quotes about religion is this one: "Preach the gospel at all times and when necessary use words." - St. Francis of Assisi
Greg Mortensen, the author of Three Cups of Tea is not a devout Christian, but he preaches the gospel through his actions every day. To me, this book was a demonstration of what the human spirit and the accepting love of God can accomplish.
So I guess I have been neglecting my blog. Sometimes I have so much to share that I feel like I blog too much, and other times I have too much swimming around in my brain to make enough sense to post. Lately I have been obsessing about vaccinations, and whether or not to get them for my girls (they are getting the H1N1 vaccines tomorrow). Food, and what I should be eating and feeding my children (Most certainly not the things that we are actually eating). Discipline, and if I am doing it right (probably not, some days I feel like Leila really runs the show around here, and I think she would agree).
We have been busy not sleeping, and again thinking about selling the house. I spent this weekend power washing the deck and front steps, re-staining the freshly washed wood (Cory helped :)) and painting the front door. Only a few more projects left...we are hoping to list in February...we shall see.
Thea is doing really well, she is getting so big and mobile. She is also teething again. She has six teeth and two more on the cusp of joining them, you would never guess that she was getting teeth though, she is really the easiest going baby I know. I am actually starting to believe that she may one day use those teeth, as she is starting to show some interest in solid food. She does not like to be fed, but I can give her table food on her tray and she will give it a try...some things more successfully than others.
Leila impresses me more all the time. Lately when we go for car rides we spend the whole time spelling with Leila. She can sound out a word and then spell it phonetically. I am amazed...my 3 year old can spell, how crazy is that? She also has a great memory. Case in point, for the last couple of weeks Leila will randomly break out with, "I want 3 things for my birthday, I want a real horse, a bean bag chair, and a trampoline!"
On Sunday Leila, Thea and I went shopping with Papa Carey. Walking though a store Leila spied a unicorn and suggested that we get that for Grandma for her birthday. Now Leila's list has been modified. When I asked her just now what she wanted for her birthday she said, "I want LOTS of things! I want a horse, a bean bag chair, a trampoline and a unicorn." When asked what she wants for Christmas, the list is shorter. "I want DOMINOES!" I will be curious to see how many sets of dominoes she ends up with for Christmas.
